Friday, 23 July 2010

Friday 23rd July

I was at the edge of the woodland and saw what can only be described as 'magnificent'. It was a noisy machine with two wheels and a grave young hooligan grasping its ears! I ran back home and tried to speak to Benjamin who was busy coercing a frog into doing something demeaning.

'Benjamin,' I said, 'what is the name of the two-wheeled thing that people ride? It's noisy and fast.'

'A bike,' Benjamin replied irritably, not taking his eyes off of the frog, which had started to complain in a loud voice. 'Possibly a motorbike.'

'What's the difference?' I asked. I was momentarily distracted by Flopsy who said hello to me but managed to ignore her.

'One has an engine,' Benjamin said quietly. 'Now piss off.'

I have written to McGregor to ask about acquiring one of these wonderful machines - I have told him that seeing as he refuses to give my clothes back he may as well compensate me. It may have to be a smaller motorbike but I'm sure that's doable.

In the afternoon I went to sit on a cow's back and admire the field. I see the two bad mice are up to their old tricks; there is a mass grave by the pond.

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